Young mum- My successful homebirth
(My birth story is quite long, so if you want to skip to the actual birth scroll down and I'll leave a heading.)
Nobody can prepare you for seeing that positive line on the test. Whether your pregnancy was planned or a surprise those same thoughts go through your head "How can I do this?" "Will I be good enough?" "How much is going to change?" Fear of failure came over me but this tiny human inside me needs me and those feelings were quickly turned into a bubbly joy and I cried like I've never cried before.
Now at this time I was young, 17, and still in college so I still had my daily doubts that I could give the best life to a baby. At my first doctor’s appointment, the woman assumed I was booking to find out about a termination and said, "but you're too young" when I told her that wasn't the case. I was offended like I'd never been offended before, which she noticed and quickly said "but the baby will be born in summer so at least it won't be cold" If I'm honest I just wanted to get out of the place as fast as I could but the family history questions just kept coming.
At my 12-week scan, 3 days before my 18th birthday, I took my partner and his mum. "Nicole?" The hospital workers shouted looking at Nathan's mum whom they assumed would be the pregnant one. "No that's me." I say and get the obligatory look up and down. Yes, I'm young, please can I just see my baby on the screen? I couldn't go on like this, could I? Getting judged by medical professionals, dreading my next appointment, surely this isn't the way it should be? I wanted to enjoy my pregnancy! That's when a friend told me about One to One and thank god she did, otherwise I wouldn't know the joys of a positive pregnancy and birth!
My first midwife was Donna up until my third trimester. Such an amazingly lovely woman. After hearing about her 5 grown up children I knew that she knew what she was doing! A brilliant wise midwife who made me feel at home and welcome. She preached to me the wonders of home birth! "No way" I thought! "what if something was to go wrong?" But she quickly assured me of my worries and I thought "at least I don't have to go back to that god-awful hospital!" and I decided that home was definitely the safest place to be! Donna put me in touch with her niece who's the same age and around the same gestation and it was so refreshing to have someone to speak to in the same situation as me! Unfortunately, due to unforeseen circumstances in the family I had to move away and switch midwives to someone who lived closer. I was so scared as I didn't know who I'd be meeting but from the very first time we met I knew that it was meant to be for Lucy to deliver my baby.
Lucy made the effort to become part of the family, she came in and made herself comfy and preached to all of my family about the joys of home birth! This was refreshing to me as all of my family thought I was crazy! I looked forward to our appointments every time they came around, she would sit and speak to me about everything not just babies! She got to know me and genuinely cared, it wasn't just small talk! She is honestly such an amazing midwife, so passionate about her job and her enthusiasm really rubs off on you! She told me about how she had her first born at 17 and she also had a boy like I was having! I related to her so much and I could never thank her enough for the care and support she gave me!
For three weeks, I'd been having horrible tightening pains and pressure down below. Lucy assured me that this was normal and to carry on doing things to bring on labour, go for long walks, bounce on my birthing ball, she even told me to have an orgasm while my mum was sat right next to me! (Thanks again for that one Lucy!) I was well and truly done with being pregnant at this point! Lucy did a sweep for me when I was 39+5 and I was 3cm! This set me off having regular contractions, I was so excited to finally meet my baby! I went to sleep to get some rest and when I woke up... nothing... no pain at all not even the ones I've been having for three weeks! All I wanted was to see my baby! The past nine months had been so long.
On the morning of the 20th August when I was 4 days late I woke up to trickling liquid. I went downstairs to the toilet embarrassed and put a pad on! I was humiliated! I texted Lucy to tell her that "I think I've peed myself" the joys of pregnancy! And off I went to my cousin’s birthday party an hour away. Half way there I got a phone call from Lucy asking me if I was sure it was pee and if she could come and check up on me. "I'm fine" I said, I didn't believe I could be in labour after the past 3 weeks! She asked how long I would be and to call her as soon as I was back so she could check up on me. I didn't understand what the big deal was! The party had lots of children playing and running around, I was taking photos and singing happy birthday but I kept getting horrible pains in my belly and lower back. It got so bad I thought “I need to go home and go to bed!” By the end of the drive home these pains were lasting a minute and coming every 5! I still did not believe I was in labour! Lucy was already at my house when I got there! She assured me I was in labour, helped set the pool up and left, my partner Nathan at this point was feeling very anxious and even went to lay down! I assured him that I needed him as each surge got stronger and stronger and he promised me he'd be there for me. Lucy came back and I was in a lot of pain. I just kept focusing on my breathing and that each time I was one step closer to meeting my little boy!
I wasn't Lucy's friend when she kept force feeding me haribos! I've never been able to eat them since! It went dark outside and candles and soft lights lit the mood for my birth. Music was playing in the background as those finale surges were pushing down in my lower back. Lucy was giving me a massage which helped more with the pain than the gas and air did! My waters popped and she assured me that I needed to get into the pool, it would help! It really did! As soon as I got into that pool the pain melted away and I started pushing. To me this didn't hurt, I just couldn't wait to meet my son! I put my hand down and felt his little head it was amazing! Lucy and Nathan watched as he came out, my mum held my hand, Gail (my second midwife) was taking some amazing photos and Nathan's mum kept assuring me that I was okay! One final push and his head was out and with that his body followed. My little boy was finally here! Nathan caught him and passed him to me! It was the most amazing feeling I have ever felt in my life! I was so happy! The girls celebrated with a glass of wine and Lucy was showing us the placenta and giving us all a little lesson on the parts of it and what it does!
It was such a calm and happy labour. I could not have done it without Lucy and the aura she brings into the room. She was the reason my labour went so well! I delivered my not so little 9lbs 14oz baby boy Rory at 22:48 without a stitch and that's all down to her helping me and telling me what to do.
That night I watched my baby sleep and his chest rise and fall. How could I create something so beautiful? Nathan hugs me and thanks me for bringing his baby into the world safely and suddenly I'm the happiest person on earth. I did it and I proved everyone wrong.